I refuse to feel guilty about it. i refuse to feel guilty about it. i refuse to feel guilty about it…..maybe if i say it enough i won’t feel guilty.

Today was a two cupcake day, and the day isn’t done. I’m struggling with a personal issue, and been struggling with making a very difficult decision. The last 24 hours it has been even more pushed to the forefront. Since this morning, i admit to eating two red velvet with cream cheese cupcakes. The good news is that it wasn’t back to back.

Emotional eating sucks. I just felt like i needed that comfort in the soft spongey texture of the cake and the smooth rich creaminess of the frosting. Did it make me feel better? No. I still feel moody and in a rather funky place. Ya know what it is, i feel lost and in that cupcake i found a place i’m familiar with. Although that cupcake didn’t last long, it was a safe place to pour myself into.

I KNOW i shouldn’t feel guilty….but i kinda sorta do at this moment. I had a whole conversation with Brittney about this. I KNOW i need to move on, and the next meal is a new chance, a new moment. I KNOW i shouldn’t dwell and be proud that i hit the ellipitical before yoga class this morning. I am proud i got moving (i was grooving along with my IPod and lovin it).

So accountablity, which is part of what this blog is about. I put my two cupcake morning out there. I put my ellipitical run out there. I am dealing with the emotional reasonings behind the two cupcakes and hopefully I will have it resolved soon.

And absolutely no guilt allowed.

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My ass hurts. Even though i used the gel seat for spin…my butt was still in a slight discomfort today. I was hoping to take Julia’s spin class after my yoga class today, but she suggested i wait. In time i am hoping to do at least three spin classes a week as I grow stronger. In the mean time i need to do something.

The idea of moving the body everyday in someway has been popping up on various fitness sites i check in on.  It doesn’t mean i would workout every single day, as i know the body does need rest, but a walk would count. Honestly, this may be the best way for me to go. If i tend to miss a day at the gym because i am suppose to rest, it seriously screws me up because i want to move and play when i get into the habit.

Starting to tomorrow i will do some sort of movement outside of my teaching classes. No routine, no set schedule, just moving and having fun. And if i miss a day, i have to start at Day 1 again. For someone like me, who can get obessive when it comes to numbers  this could be a good thing. To keep me going will be small rewards like ITune cards. (Music to infuse my workouts). For every 15 days i get $15 in ITunes that will not be work related music.

To start in small steps..my goal this week is to move every single day this week. Monday to Sunday.

Food goal is to stay on track.

SPIN

Talking myself out of going to spin class would have been very easy. In fact, I came very close to it. None of the reasons really were valid. I do this all the time. Get excited about something, then the reality hits and i am forced to go through with it or back away. Saturday morning i packed my shoes, my seat cushion and some water …off to Norwalk i went. It’s not the closest fitness center, it is about a 20 minute ride if the traffic is fairly light. The choice to go and take Karen’s class was a decision.

It was comforting that I knew this place and had friendly faces who take my yoga class there with me. It helped that Karen is super awesome (and a powerhouse of energy on the bike) and looked out for me. I felt comforted, i felt like i belonged.

My main goal was to just keep peddling for the full class. I didn’t have to do anything fancy (jumps and all that) if i didn’t want to.  When i did feel strong, i did try some jumps. I made my goal — i did the class and i peddled all the way through it.  Afterwards, a woman i never met before gave me kudos. She mentioned she had only been able to do 20 minutes when she had first started.  Dave and Lisa, a wonderful couple who takes my yoga classes, also gave me kudos. Before class Dave warned me about Karen’s enthusiasm for jumps and sprints. It was cute. The whole vibe was good. I think that helps, and i look forward to next Saturday. I even made a client book later in the afternoon so that i can attend class and shower.

My personal reward for going to the class (the first one is always the hardest) and making it through was an ITunes card (i’m addicted). Of course this lead me to be inspired in shaking up my yoga class as i am infused with new music.


THE PERFECT MOMENT AND WHO I WANT TO BE…

Years ago when i went to my first yoga class every, I came out of class saying to myself “I want her life.” I didn’t know my yoga teacher’s life outside of the classroom. All i knew was that she was a yoga teacher, a massage therapist, and a reiki master. It wasn’t what she was doing, there was just a blissness to her. Years later…i’m pretty darn close to that description.  I didn’t expect to be here today doing what i love. Honestly i didn’t expect to be a massage therapist and a yoga teacher, but i am.

I always wanted to drive a Jeep since i was at least 10 years old. There was always something about Jeeps. Maybe it was the sense of adventure i always associated with it. The commercials of a Jeep parked next to a flowing river, and campers having a good time. Yeah i know, i was 10 believing in the marketing. It never got away from me though. Last year when looking for a new car because the Sundance died on me, the Jeep Liberty was on the top of my list. I got a used Escape instead (the Jeep Liberty was too close to Fairfield soccer mom for my tastes), which is still in that category of adventuresome 4 wheel drive. My reasons for a small SUV have more to do with my profession and gardening addiction, but always in the back of my mind I want to be that adventurer. I have that freespirit, or need i say inner athlete adventurer within me.

Deep down i want to be the active girl. For years i’ve tried to do kayaking lessons for my birthday, things just haven’t worked out. I see bikers on my drives in Westport and Norwalk, although i it is a sport i never was fully interested in, i do envy their ability and being able to get out and play in Mother Nature. I always wanted to check out indoor rock climbing, and just recently i learned that a local spot had closed (bummer). I just always wanted to be that kind of girl who is up for any thing, or can say “i’m going to Vermont/camping/hiking/fill in the blank for the week end. I live in a beautiful state that has so much to offer, and i don’t take advantage of it. I envy those cars who have bike, ski or snowboard racks on them. I smile at suvs who have a canoe or kayak strapped to the top. There is just something about it. I wanna be that kind of girl.

Just today, I was telling Julia (another wonderful spin instructor with great energy who takes my class).  I asked her about the possibility of taking me out on a ride when i get stronger.  When we thaw out of our winter, it could happen as long as i keep up my spinning and strengthening my left leg. I’m not really a cyclist, but i want to experience it at least once. It would be great to play outdoors. Julia was telling me about the amazing parts of Connecticut she has seen because of her rides.  The bonus would be giving me the opportunity to meet new people, which has been harder. Julia did mention that a lot of cyclists are men, so that was an interesting tidbit.

On my way home i thought about all this. The trees were in all of their glory in various shades from green through yellow, to golden oranges and bright reds.  I was hitting a hill on the Merritt and my cd player was starting to play The Adventure by Angels and Airwaves.  (You may have heard it in a car commerical btw.) It was the perfect moment. Here i was thinking about the person i want to be at this point in my life.  The person who wants to seek adventures in nature, to explore and play in this great backyard i have. All i could do was smile. This is what i want and what i am working for. It was just the perfect moment, as if it was in a movie. Any other song could have played right then and it wouldn’t have worked, i had the location perfect, and the voice over in my head fit like it was made for that moment.  Who am i to argue with the universe.

Saturday’s spin class did more than get me moving my body, it’s getting me moving on my path.  Losing the weight is a need and a bonus. I think right now my ultimate goal is to keep pushing myself to explore these athletic endeavors.

When i turned 30, I wasn’t fearful. I put myself on the path to be who i am now. I hit 35 this year, and i am putting myself on another path of who i want to be. All i can say is 40 should be damn interesting and i can only hope that i am living life to the fullest in the years between.

The amazing and lovely Karen (the spin leader at the Y) has been so generous in sharing her spin knowledge with me.

It started with a small request in guiding me to the proper spin shoes. When i took spin ages ago, my thighs got wonderfully thinner. The downside was my booty being sore and my feet going numb. A good friend gave me a gel seat to comfort the butt slightly, but my feet would just be in pain for the last 30 minutes of class. I dropped spin because i couldn’t deal. Years later when i started teaching in the gyms, i got to ask questions of the various instructors about their classes. Amazing what ya learn by just asking questions!

Spin shoes was the answer to my numbing tootsies. But how does one buy spin shoes? What is a good spin shoe? Karen not only gave me advice, but she offered a nice morning of breakfast then taking me to a shop in Wilton/Norwalk so i can get fitted.

It started as a gray yucky morning, but turned into an amazing one by the time we parted. Before breakfast we stopped off at another gym we both work for (different locations, but same company) so I can get a tour of the new facility. Breakfast was a gab fest….it was like talking to someone i’ve known for years.  Karen has such a positive wonderful energy to her.

When we left the diner, the sun was breaking through and the leaves on the trees were just popping with colour. The cycling shop was just a whole new world for me. I think it was part of a few different outdoor activity shop (kayaks and canoes where in the back on the side, a ski and snowboard shop i think was next door, etc). It was just awe inspiring. These are the kind of things i want to experience. As a kid from an inner city, this is stuff i was never really exposed to outside of the olympics on the television.

Maybe it was the vibe of the space, or the excitement of buying new shoes — even if they are only meant for spinning. It just felt right. Yeah there was the occasional feeling like an outsider looking in, but it felt like i did belong there a little (that deep inner athlete in me). I was just in awe of all the bikes and stuff that went with them. I knew if i went alone, i would be seriously overwhelmed. I was absolutely grateful in having Karen there with me, to guide me.

Tomorrow i will go to my first spin class since buying my new shoes. I hope to eventually go to a spin class three times a week if my schedule allows. The virgo in me has been going spin nutty, reading what i can, checking out the message boards at SparkPeople.com.

Deep inside of me, i just want to be that athlete. I want to move and not huff and puff. I want to be stronger and not afraid to try new things. No fear.

Cheat day doesn’t seem right. A day of freedom maybe? A day where I’m not worried about what i put into my body. No worries of calories, no worries of what or how much to eat. Just a day to relax and let it go. Calling it a cheat day doesn’t add the positive spin i am trying to put on this journey. Freedom day doesn’t sound right either. Either way i am allowing myself one of those each week, although i am finding that i really don’t need it so much.

The first week wasn’t as hard as it could have been. I made my shopping list, and on that first Friday i cooked my meals for the week, and froze a lot for the future. That week my mom made yummy southern/soulfood style banana pudding, a weakness of mine. It’s not often that banana pudding is made, so it is a rare treat. I had to have some, even though it wasn’t my free day.  I did feel some conflicting feelings over this, including a smattering of guilt. If i had denied myself, the outcome would have been worse.

I wasn’t a hog and eating mounds of it, but i ate enough.  I went back later that evening, the next day and the day after that. A weakness. At one point i had to put aside the guilt, it was hard. I had to accept that i did eat but that i didn’t gorge, i did keep portion size and my food intake for the week was all clean eating (turkey meatloaf, cauliflower smash, veggies, brown rice, shrimp, etc).  The biggest win was and has been i haven’t had any type of soda since i started this journey.

The elimination of soda from my foods has been a huge win. The cans that would fill the recycle bin was like a small mountain.  Honestly, i would drink it even though i thought it tasted like horrible battery acid or something.  The sweetness would keep me hooked, like a drug. I would drink so much soda that i would wake up with a dehydrated hang over (major headaches and feeling really sugglish). If i knew i was drinking too much, i would make sure to have a bottle or two of water to counteract the dehyration.  Since this journey i haven’t had a drop of soda. I have been tempted, but i just look in the fridge and think about that taste which i really do not like, and i pass.

I do have a serious sugar addiction. this past week or two i have had less than a tablespoon of white sugar. i have substituted it with honey or agave nectar to lightly sweeten fruit or oatmeal.  The craving for cakes or pies haven’t happened yet. I’m looking different cookbooks so i can keep it clean.

I’ve had amazing support on this journey and it’s only the start. Brittney loaned me some of her Clean Eating and Nutrition magazines and cookbooks. I’ve been pouring over those, figuring out my menus.  I’ve stocked the fridge with grapes, bananas, peaches and sliced apples so i have no excuse. I can easily grab that for a quick snack between meals or to hold off hunger while i am waiting for the microwave to finish heating up my frozen lunch or dinner.

Today’s cooking marathon included turkey chili (four types of beans, eggplant, broccoli, squash, tomatoes, peppers, and onions), curried butternut squash soup (butternut, sweet potato, carrots, and no cream), and mashed cauliflower with garlic.  Most of it will be popped into the freezer for future consumption.

there is absolutely NO excuse for me not to go to the gym.  i am in and out of them all day six days a week teaching yoga. that’s the rub. there have been too many days where i didn’t want to peel myself out of bed an hour or two earlier to workout, or the urge to eat nixes the idea of staying after class to work after being up since 4:30am some mornings. sure i could come home, eat then a few hours later go back out to the closest fitness center,  but with gas prices that just is not possible.

planning will have to be the biggest strategy here.  i will have to make sure i eat a good breakfast and pack myself a few snacks to keep the energy levels up, so i am not crashing.

The Workout:

this summer i started working out with a wonderful trainer. i saw her teaching a bootcamp class at the hamden gym and i loved it. it was just my style. every class was different.  one day while waiting for her class to end, so that my class can begin she and our group exercise director waved me in.  my gosh it was tough and i loved it. Ann runs her own personal training business called Functional Fitness: Workouts for Women, and if you are in Connecticut check her out. After speaking with her and talking about hip issues we started to work together. i loved it even more than bootcamp. i learned to push myself. things were always changing. i would ask for more because i knew i could push it. when i wanted to push myself but my hip was in discomfort she made me back off.

unfortunately, due to my business picking up and her vacation schedule we had missed each other. i was with hope i could go back and work with her again for this, but her business has picked up and my schedule won’t allow the times she has available.  honestly, it sucks.

my workout plan for now will be what Ann gave me for homework this summer with additions.  there is access to many classes at the gyms i can take and that will fit into my schedule – Bootcamp, Straight Up Strength, Kwando, Zumba and indoor cycling.  the plan is variety. i get bored too easily and i have a slight dislike for cardio, although one product has made it much better.

Cardio Coach

if you have noticed there is a link to Cardio Coach on the side. a few years ago on a great fitness forum, i found the link to Cardio Coach due to a CT woman who had no connection to him besides being a customer and loving the product.  at that time Coach Sean, the owner and mastermind behind this program, was offering a free volume 2 download. extremely generous, but marketing genius.  i was on dial up at the time, so she offered to download for me if i sent her the email link and snail mail it to me.  it was free, what did i have to lose?  Cardio Coach helped me go from really disliking those cardio machines in the gym, to seriously tolerating them.

i have gone from just five minutes of being killed on the elliptical, to now holding my own and feeling really good for a full hour on it.  the ellipitcal gets a special mention because it was the most difficult machine for me to tackle. Cardio Coachis an mp3 or cd that uses interval training, which i always knew was a good thing for building strength and speed when it comes to cardio. i tried doing it on my own, but i would lose track of time. here is Coach Sean telling me in my ear when to push it, when to back off, when to come into a steady state and always encouraging you throughout the whole volume. if i am not mistaken he was one of the firsts to put out these types of workouts on cd/mp3s.

i first stumbled upon Coach Sean i believe he only had three volumes out at the time, with the fourth volume due out soon.  when that fourth volume did come out, he had a sale and i was able to pick up the first, third and the fourth volumes to add to the second that i already had. now he has up to seven volumes (i believe the 7th just came out or will come out by the time i post this).  at this point i’m really not ready for anything beyond the fourth. each one gets progressively longer and more difficult even though you can take it at your own level.the plan includes to use my Cardio Coach mp3 on the cardio equiptment at the gym (changing the piece of equitpment to keep it fresh).

Indoor Cycling

when i lost the biggest amount of weight in my Weight Watchers era, i was indoor cycling. my lovely friend Yell was teaching at the time and invited me to her class. it wasn’t love at first pedal, again it was tolerable. i wasn’t strong enough to do the standing in the saddle with the crazy reisistance, but i went into it with the goal of just pedding for the whole class. i did. i made it and went back again. my thighs were the smallest they ever gotten in my adult life.

there were two issues i did have with spinning. 1. my butt hurt! those seats are so freakin hard. Yell did help take some of the sting away by giving me a gel seat that was in lost and found. that made it a bit more tolerable. 2, my feet hurt because i was wearing your regular run of the mill sneakers. it was very pinchy. i had no idea that there were special shoes. according to the Queen of Spin at the Y, Karen, they have a harder sole.  on thursday we are taking her hubby’s cute BMW z4 (i love this car) for a drive to breakfast and a cycling store in Wilton so i can try on some shoes.

when i get the new spin shoes and with my gel seat, i plan on adding spin to the workout schedule. i can take the 5:45am classes at one of the gyms on two of the days i teach in that area.

Extra

the boxing bag is on my list of things to add to the workout. i already own a pair of pink 12oz gloves. Ann would let me hit the bag and i loved it. one of the gyms has a whole boxing room and in the mornings it is usually empty. i am in that particular gym twice a week.

THE PLAN: Sunday October 5th – Saturday October 11th

Sunday – yoga

Monday – Cardio Coach Vol. 1on the eliptical & Ann’s routine/homeworkwith the Bosu

Tuesday – 8-9am Bootcamp with Karin in Stratford & Yoga

Wednesday – 5:30-6:30pm Straight Up Strength with Eileen  & Cardio Coach Vol. 1on the eliptical

Thursday – If my hip is feeling good Kwando with Kristin at 6:30pm

Friday – DVD of my choice & Cardio Coach Vol. 1 on the elliptical

Saturday – rest

i reserve the right to change things as i need to, my clients come first.

Live. Love. Laugh.

to lose weight the math is simple…calories in versus calories out.

Calories In:

there are tons of programs out there which have worked for many people – weight watchers, jenny craig, the zone, atkins, south beach, etc.  cut the carbs, cut the fat, cut the (fill in the blank). i have to take a holistic approach to my journey. when things are too restrictive with food, i end up on a binge doing more harm. it’s that control issue.

as i have gotten further in my wellness journey with teaching yoga and opening my own massage therapy practice, i’ve increased my interest in nutrition.  at somepoint i would love to attend a particular nutritional program offered in NYC.  this is the perfect time to explore that aspect of health using this experience as a foundation.  after reviewing numerous ways to eat, clean eating and intutitive eating are the two that stand out and connect with me.  if you know me in real life, i am a gardner and a cook. i know the value of a tomato off of the vine, or not being afraid to try a new vegetable. there is a real passion  and love for real fresh foods.  i fell into a rut of processed foods because of the ease due to my crazy schedule. it’s time go back to real foods and making my own meals. for convience, i will keep a stack of prepared meals that i’ve cooked in the freezer for a quick defrost and microwave when i am in a pinch.

i am aiming for 85% -90% clean eating. there will be things i need to use processed (canned beans, tomato paste, frozen veggies in some cases, etc). this is a lifestyle change, not a diet. so for now i am going to eat clean at least 6 days a week.  i don’t want to call it a cheat day. it’s more like a free day where IF i want something that is not clean, there is no guilt and no binge. Friday will be my day.

i’ll get into the principles of clean eating and intutive eating for another post.  there are many books and even magazines out there on the subject these days.  i can be very type A personality at times, so i like to prepare and plan.  since i put my foot down that i was going to finally lose weight, i’ve been pouring over my cookbooks and magazines. friday i hit the markets, picked over what was left in the garden, and hunkered down cooking up a storm.  i’m not going to stay to the exact menu, but i have choices. and if i want to make something else that is in the clean eating principle i will, and freeze some for a later date.

split between the freezer and the fridge are:

soups: butternut squash, lentil and barley stew, and shrimp with veggies broth

proteins: turkey meat loaf, and grilled or boiled shrimp

veggies: mashed cauliflower, and various frozen veggies

at this point i am not paying attention to calories.  I am checking out the calories, and with respect choosing recipes that aren’t insane with them.  i have switched refined sugar in my tea or on my oatmeal to honey or agave nectar.

down the road i would love to try a day with just raw food. right now i’m not ready for that big of a change. there is plenty of time for that because this is a lifestyle change not a diet. if i need to tweek anything i will, i have to listen to my body and see what happens.

Live. Love. Laugh.

“i didn’t know we were going to sweat!” said the older woman next to me.

Karin the instructor responded, “that is why it’s called Cardio Tease.  some men like a little sweat.”

it was a great exchange and the whole class laughed because we were all sweating.  Cardio Tease is strip tease choreography, sexiness, and a workout rolled all into one…with your clothes on!  at one point your mind turns off thinking about what you are doing, and  just have fun with it.

the class was filled with seven beautiful women, including the instructor, of all shapes and sizes bringing out their sexiness with sultry moves.  the moves weren’t crazy difficult. i was able to follow along quite well. (although i have two left feet with choreography, i do have some rhythm), at some point you get so into it, and nerves fly out the window. you forget about the men, taking moments out of their workout on the other side of the window, to check us out. maybe it had something to do with the energy in the room, awesome music Karen picked out, just being in the moment, or all of the above.

although my knees and hips made me modify some of the moves, i felt damn sexy.  i didn’t feel like a potato.  sweat dripping into my eyes. my core, hips and thighs were absolutely getting worked.  i laughed, had fun and was happy i didn’t talk myself out taking the class.

choreography is not always my friend.  me taking a step or a hi/lo class is watching a train wreck. choreography is one of the reasons why i don’t teach Zumba that i am certified for.  i love to dance, but i can’t always get down the moves.  Hip Hop, Cardio Tease, Bellydancing, Zumba, Latin Impact, and various other unique classes have been offered at the various fitness centers i work in.  one of two things usually happened, i couldn’t go because i was scheduled somewhere to teach or i would talk myself out of it.

i couldn’t come up with a valid excuse. since i was already teaching i would already be there with an hour in between to kill. the class i teach on friday morning wasn’t before sunrise, so i didn’t have to be in bed early.  there was no way i could talk myself out of it. i’m happy that i didn’t.

the hour to kill between teaching and teasing was spent on the elliptical and stretching, just a nice steady state cardio since i wasn’t quite sure exactly what  Cardio Tease was going to be, besides the obvious.  it was nice and what my body needed. my hips started to feel pangs of discomfort, and i started to stretch (pigeon pose and a few twists) until Cardio Tease time.

when Karin offers this class again, i will be there if i am not teaching. i’m contemplating taking her Hip Hop class on wednesday evening. classes like these make cardio fun and interesting for me.

…oh and yes we did slap our butts.

Live. Love. Laugh

why put myself out there? why let friends and strangers in on my journey? the answer is to be honest and truthful in my journey.

i’m a 6 time Weight Watchers drop out. it wasn’t because of the program itself. Weight Watchers is fabulous and i did lose weight with it. i lost the most weight when i didn’t have to go on this journey alone, when i had a buddy. eventually the buddy would stop going and drop out of Weight Watchers. sure they had all those people in there, but there is nothing like having someone you already know with you in the battlefield. side by side fighting the same war,  having someone talk you down when you want to reach for the croissant.

the group concept of support is a good thing, although when i was alone in that room, without a friend to lean on, i would hide. making myself invisible by sitting in the back and not speaking up to say a great loss or a bad gain assisted in my failure in the program. i did keep going back because i remembered those 14lbs i first dropped off of my body. i really wanted to do this, then i would get into my own way. obsession can be the only word to describe it.

obsession opened the door for the emotional aspects of losing weight. the first big goal on your Weight Watchers folder is 20%. sure they give you 5lb stickers, gold stars and 10% bookmarks…but the first big benchmark is 20%. in all of the six times i walked through those doors i never made it to 20%. i would get so obsessed with losing weight, obsessed with the number on the scale, and obsessed with points, so when i gained  i didn’t know how to handle it. emotional eating would come into play.  other life things were going on at the same time, only to contribute to my emotional eating.

yes i am an emotional eater…and then some. not only do i use food for comfort, but also for control at times.

hello, my name is michelle and i am a binge eater. i can’t tell you when i started binge eating. memories flood my mind of being surrounded by pecan pinwheels, powered donuts, soda, chips, reeses peanut butter cups, fast food, etc. i could go on and on and on. just feeding my face to suppress the depression or to fight back proving that i was in control and no one was going to tell me what i could or should eat. oh and  i would eat. it didn’t matter if i was hungry, but most of the time i was. the sad thing, was that once i started i couldn’t completely stop, even if the pinwheels started to taste gross, and the soda tasted like battery acid.  i would still eat them. the wrappers would be tossed as soon as i could.

the food would be snuck in and i would go to my room to feast.  i didn’t want the judgment and i didn’t want to be policed. what i did wasn’t healthy for me, and i was causing myself harm with the binge.

it’s not that i am unhappy with my body, yoga has taught me acceptance of being in my body.

working in the fitness and wellness field, i want to stop feeling like a hypocrite.  as i mentioned before it’s not about being skinny, it’s about being healthy in mind and body. i need to lose weight for health reasons — diabetes which runs in the family and hip discomfort which plagues me.

my start day is sunday October 5th,2008. why not start now? i need set up my plan, which i will write about soon

putting this out there keeps me honest and makes me accountable. in turn, putting up this blog i’ve started to inspire others. honestly, i didn’t intend to do that, but i am with open arms welcoming it since going through the journey alone is not fun. i know i am lucky in that i have many wonderful people rooting me on and i thank you all.

Live.Love.Laugh,

m

I  feel like a potato.
Really. I was in a yoga class one day  wearing a grey t shirt and yoga pants. I looked in the mirror and right away, I knew what i reminded myself of – a potato. Somewhere along the the few years i lost most of curves with emotional eating, less movement, and putting low quality foods into my body. I know how i got here, and honestly i know the formula of how to get out of this potato body and find my curves again. So what’s my problem?
Honestly, I’m not sure. One goal of this blog is to help me figure it out, and to keep me accountable for my weight loss journey. Going public puts it out there, whether people read or not. I know this blog is here with my workouts, my foods, and what ever i need to work through.
Making a blog about my journey, keeps me honest and hopefully on track.From Fat to Fierce is not about me getting “skinny,” i’ve never been that in my life and i don’t think it is in my genes. I believe in a healthy weight while being curvy. Right now i’m fat (it’s true, and there is nothing wrong with that word). I miss my curves.  This blog is about accountablity and getting not just a smaller non potato body, but a healthier lifestyle and loving my body.
My goals for this journey:
  • to lower my body fat, weight, and inches (numbers are coming soon)
  • to accomplish some yoga goals ( forearm stand and handstand without the wall) and acro yoga
  • to bring out my inner athlete
  • to not turn to food for comfort when emotionally distressed
  • in losing weight to take relieve some physical discomforts that happened within in the last two years.
Welcome to my journey, from fat to fierce i go!
Live.Love.Laugh,
m